Should scratches all over hubby’s back worry me?
Dear BMW,
Last night I noticed what look like back scratches across the center of my husband’s back, below the shoulder blades (where one’s hands would go for scratching) and they are deep and look similar to stretch marks or stress marks. Some look like they’re caused by fingers, most are like the full width of the back. Someone would have had to seriously scratch hard for these to be so dark.
I sometimes overthink so, I can’t shut up my brain about it, and I want to believe him that it might be from taking up working out recently, yard work on his back against a board, or stretching possibly. But he doesn’t have a real explanation as he doesn’t know where he got them.
I’m 30 and he is 32. We are happy together and he has never shown any signs of infidelity. He’s always busy with me, never texting around on his phone or doing anything suspicious. It would have to be at work… but we’re together literally always and there is like one girl there.
So where is he getting the scratches and should I really be worrying about it?
Overthinking Bae (OB), via WhatsApp, Liwonde
Dear OB,
You are not overthinking. Not at all, as the contemporary Malawian woman goes to great lengths to find out the secrets lives of her husband. And over the years, the Association of Wives (AoW) has been sharing various tips to newly-married ones on how to search for clues.
I believe you are putting those tips to good use. Because why would you be looking at his skin for scratches?
But I can’t blame you. Side chicks these days can do anything. Actually, the present-day side chick is keen to leave marks all over – to make her presence known. They claw their sharp nails on a man’s back delivering pleasure in the wrong quarters.
Third wheels are even worse. They will ensure that the men get home with unused condoms in their pockets, receipts of hotel rooms tucked securely at a small corner in the briefcase, or strands of their Brazilian hair bizarrely entangled on the spikes of their boxers. As if that is not enough, they follow up with a late-night text message to inquire if he got home safe.
Hubby’s back scratch marks should tell you one thing though that your reckless competitors are reluctantly lying in wait to be provoked by any slight attack so that they can come out of their hiding spots. So, hold on to what you have. A bird in hand is twice in the bush!
However, my question to all side chicks and third wheels is, is it not a simple ground rule that items must be returned to the owner in perfect working condition?
OB, your man is cheating, uwona kuti utani!
Big Man Wamkulu
